[AUDITIONS Open Post]

[quote_gentle_unquote]

The little stage in the cafe is bare, with a small table of generic props set by the steps leading up to it - some looseleaf papers, a small ball, a box, a few long-stemmed flowers. Susan and Nina have pulled a long, narrow table to the center of the room, parallel to the stage, and set up chairs for the two of them and Bacchus; Susan has added little notebooks and pens at each space. There's fresh coffee in the corner, and a kettle full of hot water next to an assortment of teabags. Copies of a little sign have been tacked up here and there, listing the order of operations: Tell us your preferred role. Auditions will include the following, in order. First: MONOLOGUE; Second: COLD READ; Third (optional) TALENT [swordfighting, singing, dancing, etc.]

The room is set up primarily for Susan, Nina, and Bacchus to observe the auditions, but since the cafe is a common space, they've not blocked it off - anyone can stop in to observe an audition or two, unless the person auditioning has requested an empty room.

Once everything is ready, Susan throws open the door for their first contender.

Comments

[georgianosity]

Georgia has absolutely ZERO intention of appearing in the play. However, they were gearing up for Rom and Jul when she left, and she maybe feels the weensiest bit nostalgic? Not for the tragic plays she was forced into by the fascists at Stalag 14, which as far as she could tell were just bum-oley kissing competitions between Wet Lindsay, Nauseating P. Green and Jas, but it was always a riot backstage with her mates and the Foxwood boys. (She does NOT just mean Dave the Laugh, she hardly thinks about him at all—but it must be said that he is, after all, a laugh!! Is Georgia not supposed to notice? It is quite literally in the name.)

Besides, it would be cruel to deprive the world of her hilariosity and geniosity. So she gets up on stage and delivers the only lines she can remember:

If pants be rough with you, be rough with pants;
Prick pants for pricking, and you beat pants down.
Give me a case to put my pants in:
A pants for my pants! what care I
What curious pants doth quote deformities?
Here are the beetle pants shall blush for me.¹

It's only too bad she couldn't include Romeo's lines, because when they'd done this scene in rehearsals and Miss Wilson intoned "I am too sore enpierced with his shaft" Rosie had muttered "Oo-er" and made them all fall over laughing like loons on loon tablets. But she does add the other Merc line she'd memorized straight off the bat, which does not need to be changed at all—even ol' Billy Shakes had his moments of comedy genius: "Alas, poor Romeo! He is already dead, stabbed with a... well, I can't remember all of this bit but it ends with the pin of his heart cleft with the blind bow-boy's butt shaft."

She bows, completely ignoring the cold reading section and continuing, "I will now perform my talent."

She takes out some items she's got from the Mansion now that it's behaving again—a horned Viking hat, earmuffs to go on top, and two little hand paddles—and performs the Viking hornpipe disco inferno extravaganza dance. Viking salute with both paddles pointed at the horns. A cry of "Thor!!" and jump turn to the right. Then paddle paddle paddle to the right, to the left, yell "Thor!!" again and jump turn to the left to repeat. Face forward and high hornpipe skipping eight times. Then a bit of quick one-two paddling to either side while looking for land to the left and right with a concerned expression. Then open eyes wide, yell "LAND AHOYYY!!", fall to knees and throw paddles in the air.

"It's better in a group," she explains as she gets up.

¹Romeo and Juliet, Act I, Scene 4. Approximately.

[vineleaves]

...Dionysus decides he should probably have a conversation with Mercutio sooner rather than later.


Still though, that was a lot to have (more or less) memorized without being able to look any of it up beforehand, so despite whatever else he thinks about any of it, he has to admit this Georgia must be good at remembering lines. He claps politely and thanks her for the audition.

[ravkanwitch]

Nina somehow manages to keep a straight face through all of this, probably made possible after a hefty amount of practice during the slumber party. "Good job," she tells Georgia, applauding as well. She leans over to Susan at this point. "I told you she was a natural!"

[quote_gentle_unquote]

Susan is stunned into silence. She tries to picture Lucy acting like that, cannot, and then gives up entirely. Eventually, she manage, "And are you trying out for Dorothy?"

[georgianosity]

"Oh, I'm not going to be in a play. How very naff. I'll do the backstagey bits though if any of my mates are involved."